Another Toe Tale

A couple of weeks ago, I received a text from our beautiful and awesome daycare provider:

Need bubble wrap for J. He dropped a rock on his big toe. Think he may lose toenail, but he's handling it well :) Told him he didn't need to compete w/u :)

I knew she had it under control, so I momentarily thought, "Oh, poor guy" and continued on with my work day. Frankly, I had forgotten about the injury until I pulled up to her house and saw the little man limping around.

He attempted to meet me halfway up the driveway, but his dragging limb slowed him down. He was tearless and quite proud when he showed me this:



And if you desire a closer look...



Having recently endured some toenail issues myself, I cringed at the sight as I could nearly feel the throbbing pain that accompanies a wounded toe. J tends to be the overly dramatic type, so I was shocked by his manly attitude.

All was fine and dandy until he stubbed the toe going up the stairs when we arrived home. Brought to his knees on account of the pain, he wanted to do nothing more than go to bed with his favorite football blanket. He didn't even want to eat. This was something so out of character (food has been his main priority in life since day one) that my aching heart couldn't take it anymore, and I instantly offered fruit snacks and a movie to go along with an ice pack and ibuprofen.



The pain subsided as expected, and after a couple of days in toenail limbo, the highly anticipated separation occurred.




Daddy, unfortunately, was absent for the pinnacle of this toenail event, so thoughtful J so lovingly saved the dearly departed piece for Daddy's viewing pleasure.



Lucky him.

Obedience

Me: J, please put on your flip-flops.

J: Why?

Me: Should 'why' be your first response if you are being obedient?

J: No.

Me: What should it be?

J: Yes, I will. (long pause) Let's just stop talking about this obedience thing, ok?

Law & Order

The suspect:




The weapon:



The only witness was preparing supper and heard a shout from the bathroom. "Don't worry! I'm just cleaning up the mirror."

The crime scene:











The charge: Destruction of property with a non-deadly weapon, misdemeanor. If found guilty, the suspect could face a maximum penalty of life-time cleaning chores.

The verdict: Guilty as charged.

The sentence: Thirty seconds of community/family service cleaning the crime scene, enduring mug shots for the blog, and 13.5 years probation. (The judge took into consideration that no injuries were incurred during the committing of this crime and that the mirror was in desperate need of a cleaning anyway.)

How Great is Our God

I love it when God manifests his power, control, mightiness, love, and greatness in such an obvious fashion that He leaves me awestruck and wondering, “How could anyone not believe?”

Give thanks to the Lord, call on his name;
Make known among the nations what he has done.
Sing to him, sing praise to him;
Tell of all his wonderful acts.
Glory in his holy name;
Let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice.
Look to the Lord and his strength;
Seek his face always.
Psalm 105: 1-4

Memory Lane: Part 3

January 4, 2009 -- Great-great Grandma (Babi) died at 102 years of age. Not even being three, J was given a simple explanation that Babi went to heaven to be with Jesus. After seeing her body in the casket and the crucifix on the wall, J understandably thought the church itself was heaven.
UPDATE: About three months ago while in our home town, we drove by the church. J saw it and said, “That’s the place we go to see people after they're dead. Do you remember when I thought that place was heaven? That’s so silly!” What a revelation for the little guy!

Bossy J: “Sit down, Steven!”

E laughs out loud at J in the bathtub—1/12/09

J: I have too much to do, Mommy. I have to color, do my tracing book, play in my room. I have too much to do.

Mom referred to cousin, T, as a black kid. J corrected, “No, T, is not a black kid. He is a gray kid.”

Eva rolls over from tummy to back – 1/18/2009

J: I don’t like that Pharaoh.

J: See you later. I’m going to South America.

Daddy made J a staff while trimming trees. J was Moses and Mommy was Pharaoh.

J apparently didn’t get enough sleep when he yelled, “Get out of my room. I’m still sleeping.”

Mommy and J made a thunderstorm cake for Daddy’s birthday.

J was bringing Mommy cups of pretend tea. Soon the game took a total boy twist, and the cups were filled with puke, vomit, blood, and sputum. Yummy…sputum!

We had our church group at our home, and it was getting late. J was tired and meltdowns were becoming more frequent. He announced he was tired and just dropped his pants in front of all. That will clear a room in a hurry.

We were trying to decide if we should stick to our plans of cousin, T, babysitting while we went on a date. J interrupted, “Here’s the deal guys. You are going to go on a date, and T is going to come babysit me.”

Our conversation on the way to work before J decided that pooping on the toilet wasn’t scary:
J: Mommy, do you know who poops on the toilet?
Me: Who? Diego?
J: Ya, but so does John McCain and also Joe Biden

Mommy: J, how did you poop like a big boy?
J: I pushed really hard, then I tooted, then the poop came out.

Mom: J, pick out two books to read.
J: But my new favorite number is three.

We stopped at the pet store to play with a puppy. J wanted to name it car seat.

J: Nobody loves me. (from Ice Age)
M: Of course, people love you. Name someone who loves you.
J: My friend-cousin, J.

Mom had a sinus infection and needed to go to the doctor. On the way there, J asked if they were going to poke me.
Me: No
J: Mom, you hafta be a big girl at the doctor’s. No crying or they won’t like you. And you need to be a good listener, ok?

Daddy and J were discussing a rough day at daycare.
Dad: J, you need to behave at H’s.
J: Sometimes behaves is my thing. Sometimes behaves is not my thing.

J found a stuffed animal that he loved as a baby. He has now named it “Board.”

J exaggerated a sore throat on a Monday morning. After much debates as to if he should stay at home or go to daycare, Mommy left for daycare and work with E, leaving Daddy and J home for the day. Within minutes of Mommy’s departure, J suddenly was feeling better and wanted to play on his new swing set. Much to his dismay, Daddy called his bluff and made him go to daycare instead. All the way there, J was sad and upset. He kept repeating, “This was not my plan…this was not my plan.” If he’s faking an illness at 3 years and two months of age, what will high school be like?!?

And there you have it… my only attempt at keeping a record of happenings at our house…until this blog, of course. I'm hoping this won't fizzle out as quickly as the last attempt did.

Memory Lane: Part 2

J was wrapping up being two and heading into the three...

I appreciate you stop (fill in blank -- talking, singing, dancing, etc). Such a bossy little guy.

We are always pretending and imagining. J assigns us roles depeding upon which game is going on in his little but busy mind.
Go, Diego, Go: J -- Diego; Dad -- Baby Jaguar; E -- Dora; Mom -- Alicia

The Wiggles: J -- Greg; Dad -- Anthony; Mom -- Jeff; E -- Murray
Christmas story: J -- Joseph; Dad -- shepherd; Mom -- Mary; E -- Baby Jesus
The Incredibles: J -- Mr. Incredible; Dad -- Dash; Mom -- Elastigirl; E -- Violet
My cousins, The As - J -- Ed; Mom -- Lisa

When having to poop, J will ask for a diaper and say, "I need some privacy please," and go about his business behind a closed door in his room. Once Daddy went into his room to check on him, and he slowly and sternly stated, "I'm pooping. Leave me alone and close the door."

J will give us concerts like worship team at church. Before starting, he asked, "Mommy, will you pray with me?" His prayer: Dear God, please keep us healthy and strong. Keep Daddy safe driving to work. Help Mommy feel all better. J self-control so no whine, scream, no yell. Help E feel all better. Amen.

With guitar in hand, J said, "This is David Cook (American Idol winner) playing Fruit Salad (Wiggles song)."

Dinner conversation
J: Daddy, I'm gooish.
Dad: What?
J: I'm gooish.
Mom: You are not Jewish.
J: Yes, I am.
Mom: No you're not. You are a Christian.
J: A Christian? (blank I'm-not-gonna-win this-one look) Daddy, do you have a penis or something?
And the conversation continued about penises.

J & Mom were playing Diego outside, and J ran to a tree and exclaimed, "Alicia, look at all of these poker chips!" He meant wood chips.

J received a Thomas the Train card game for Christmas. J picked up the cards and said, "Check." Guess whose Daddy likes to play poker.

Dad: J, are you going to wake up?
J: I'm gonna rest in my bed all day.
Dad: Who's going to help me eat pancakes.
J: I'm awake.

J to Daddy while playing with blocks, "Daddy, you're irritating me."

J to his Grandma B: Your food makes me sick." Time for the talk on being polite.

After a very cold weekend of doing nothing, J stated his favorite part of the day as "hmmmmmm...eating."

To be continued...

Memory Lane: Part 1

I recently found a notebook containing a few stories about us. Actually, most of them are J's quotes. E was either in utero or non-verbal during this brief time of trying to be a supermom. This was my obviously feeble attempt at documenting some funny and memorable moments at our house. Since this activity fizzled out in a hurry, I've decide to take a walk down memory lane and highlight a few funnies here. Plus, I know that it's only a matter of time before the notebook disappears forever or falls into the hands of a destructive toddler armed with markers and scissors.

I received a great idea from a friend recently. She suggested jotting down funny moments or words that happen and then read them as a family the first of every year. Since I'm starting quite late, I'm going to try to recollect a few funnies from our past first. When things happened, I thought I'd never forget, but as life moves on, I unfortunately have forgotten. Hopefully, this will be a way for us to keep things in perspective and laugh.
Love,
Mom
12-17-2008

J at 13 months: J pointed to the pictures of himself on the wall and stated, "Handsome."

J at 14 months: Trying to get my attention at a busy time at Grandma and Grandpa's house, J shouted, "Katie!" I'll always be "Mom" to you, little guy.

J at 18 months: J frowned and scowled at his plate when it was set in front of him for supper. Mom asked, "What's the problem? What do you want?" He responded with a serious voice, "Pizza."

Within the past 2-3 months (of 12-17-2008)...

J was scooting around on a play car and announced, "I went to see Barack Obama. Now I'm going to see John McCain."

When potty training started, J went on a pooping boycott. He stated, "I'm not going to poop anymore. Just you (mom) and daddy can poop."

J: "Daddy, you are one funny guy."

After eating over half of the homemade chicken nuggets, J announced that he was not going to eat them anymore. I asked, "Why?" He replied, "Because they are disgusting and repulsive."

When asked to do a favor like getting a diaper for E, J frequently replies, "I have to check my email first" or "I need to send a text first."

While we were in the hospital after having E, J asked, "Mommy, did the baby come out of your tummy?"
"Yes, she's over there. Her name is E."
He replied, "Do you have a brother in your tummy?"

J claims to go to work where he fixes "sterilizers and anesthesia booms just like Daddy."

Keeping with the Parenting with Love and Logic method, J asked, "Mommy, can we watch Thomas." I replied, "No." He then said, "Mommy, we can watch Thomas or we can watch the Backyardigans."

To be continued...

Potty Issues

J hasn't had a bed wetting incident in months. However, in the past week he's experienced waking up in a soaked bed on four separate occasions. We try not to make a big deal out of it because he has the dramatic, screaming, freak out reaction covered for all of us, but the additional laundry is becoming quite inconvenient.

I have a difficult time keeping up with the usual laundry tasks as it stands. We frequently sport the crumpled-up-clothes-left-in-the-laundry-basket-too-long look. Please, for the sake of my sanity, just go ahead pretending as if you don't notice.

I'm hoping that this is simply a short phase...the bed wetting, that is. I've already given up hope on being a super-duper launderer. Perhaps the accidents are due to sleeping a little deeper than usual or the extra fluid intake during hot days. Whatever the cause, I know that I'm not the only one giving this some extra thought.

One night J stated, "I want to sleep in your bed." Quick to reply, I said, "No." With a sheepish grin he pleaded, "That way I won't pee in my bed."

Oil Spill

This morning I was frantically chasing from one room to the next in an attempt to get me and two kids to church on time. Totally didn't happen...again! My consistent church tardiness leaves me wondering what I actually miss at the beginning of the service.

While I was putting on E's shoes for the fourth time, J described to me the scenario in which he and his superheros were in this morning.

"We're diving down deep in the water trying to fix the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. They're using this machine that looks like an alligator. It's made out of Legos."

Sounds better than most of the other proposed solutions so far.

Sweet Dreams

While walking to J’s room to put him to bed for the night, I paused for a moment to survey the disaster zone that we call our home. I’m not sure where I’ve gone wrong (probably the schedule in which we are never home), but this place is out of control. I muttered, “Oh, I can’t stand this crap hole anymore.” Naturally, my four year old incorporated the term “crap hole” into his next three sentences.

Me: Ok, let’s not say that word anymore.

J: Why?

Me: It’s really not that nice. We can say junk hole or disaster instead. If you say that word again, you’ll have a consequence. If I say that word again, I’ll have a consequence.

J: Ya, like no crocheting.

He may as well have just called me a complete dork instead.

As I was preparing to exit his room, I kissed him and said something that I’ve never said to him at nighttime before and really haven’t ever said in general: “Good night. Don’t let the bed bugs bite.”

How this old adage ever came about, I have no idea. I do know that it sent Mr. Literal into a question asking frenzy. Needless to say, his anxiety level was higher after I left his room than when we initiated the bedtime routine. Really, though, what’s not comforting and soothing about the mention of blood hungry, bed dwelling insects at the moment one takes a recumbent position in his sleeping quarters?

Well, now I’m not just a complete dork. Now I am a complete dork who will have a freaked out, nightmare ridden boy crawling into bed with her at 3:00 AM.



Sweet dreams to all!

Christmas in July

A few days ago the heat index reached 115 degrees. That’s hot. But it’s still better than winter.

When winter rears its ugly head, I become envious of the hibernating bears. The roads are treacherous and pipes freeze. Snot, fresh and dried, invades every activity of daily living with children. My COPD patients acquire pneumonia at an alarming rate, and my hands become so dry and cracked that I could use them to sand down a wooden floor. Only a few are spared from cabin fever and the inevitable seasonal depression that follows. The layers required in frigid weather tack on an extra ten minutes to the “getting out of the house” routine, and no one can ever locate the hat or mittens. It takes twenty minutes to get everyone bundled up to play in the backyard for three minutes, and two loads of laundry are created instantly.







This past winter was especially brutal. The snow and cold stopped us in our tracks most of the season…even on Christmas. Initially, I was so disappointed that we wouldn’t be celebrating Christmas with my extended family at my grandparents’ home back in our home town. That’s one of the highlights of every holiday season for me, and I’ve been there on Christmas Eve nearly every year that I have been alive.

However, being snowed in ended up being such a blessing for our little family. There was no packing up the entire house or getting out of the normal routine. There was more time for naps and relaxation. Most importantly, we were able to better focus on the reason for the celebration and start a few traditions of our own.

Fortunately, we were able to make it to the grocery store before the blizzard hit, so we didn't have to eat E.



We went on glycemic excursions after making cookies and other treats.



E wondering why we don't have cinnamon rolls for breakfast every morning.





I'd like to take the credit for decorating these beauties, but a diabetic patient gave them to me. At least he didn't eat them, right?



Although Santa makes an annual visit to our home, we try not to play up the myth too much. However, J acquired an enormous amount of Santa knowledge (Thank you very much, Dora the Explorer!), so we just went with it. He insisted on leaving out hay for the reindeer and writing a letter to Santa.






On Christmas morning, we used the children’s nativity set to interactively illustrate the Bible reading about the birth of our Savior. We made a birthday cake for Jesus because He is the reason for the season.












Hands down, the cake was the very best part of our Christmas celebration at home. With the help of my dear husband, we cut out LOTS of paper candles with many of the different names used in the Bible to refer to Jesus. It was a beautiful way to focus on all of the many things that God is to us and does for us. The best part was being able to include J in on the discussion. Since J’s world exclusively revolved around superheroes at the time, we were able to bring it down to his level by pointing out that God had all of these superhuman powers and that Jesus was the greatest superhero of all.

Celebrating Jesus’ birthday at home was so incredibly fun that we’re really going to have a decision on our hands in December: Carry on our newly founded family traditions or pack up the house and hit the road.

There’s no time to debate over this now, however. The heat has us gladly racing to the pool. I love summer!

Funny Friday

What? You don't have a construction hat wearing bird helping you pick up toys?

Eight Years

From the backseat of the car yesterday, J asked, "What day is today?" I replied, "Monday, July 12th. Tomorrow is Daddy and Mommy's wedding anniversary." He then leaned in E's direction and whispered, "You hear that, E? We have to tell them happy anniversary tomorrow." And they did!

It's incredible how much Steve and I have grown and changed over the past eight years. That's a good thing because looking back at the wedding day snapshots and seeing a young bride standing on the bar in her white gown with a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other hand is oh, so embarrassing! The picture alone makes a compelling case for locking up our daughter forever.

I love being married, and I always have. Don't get me wrong though. Maintaining and growing our marriage is not always a walk in the park. There were some moments and stretches (i.e., sleepless, hormonal post-partum days) in our marriage so far that I could have lived without, but sometimes we learn best from these rocky times.

I would, without one single doubt, say "I do" to this man all over again. Happy, happy anniversary, Steve! I love you even more than I did eight years ago.

J's Quote of the Day. . .

"I love it when girls toot."

Learning Time

At four years of age, J has been blessed with a memory that is more impressive than those of most adults I know. Usually we have to discuss something once or twice, and he is able to retain the information. The near instant results and successes make teaching him seem effortless and so darn fun.

Sharks have been at the center of his obsessions for months now, so we've just used that interest to expand and bring in a few other topics like oceans, continents, and natural disasters. One of his favorite learning activities with me is the Sentence Game. We simply alternate between writing and readings sentences. Add the word "game" to any activity with a surprise element such as "No looking until I'm finished" statement, and it automatically becomes interesting to this little guy.



We alone cannot take the credit for all he knows, however. Far from it, in fact. H, our daycare provider, is AMAZING and includes J in her homeschooling efforts. Her patience and dedication are second to none. There is no preschool in the entire world that could measure up to the experiences and topics that J gets in on at her house. Thanks to the ABC Bible verse of the week that they recently started, J now officially has committed more verses to memory than I have.


(I had a better video with more ocean trivia, but for some reason it wouldn't upload.)

H, I know we don't tell you enough, but you are SO, SO, SO appreciated and loved. We are so blessed to have you in our lives. Thank you!

Poor Me

J & I made a trip to the local minor care clinic this evening. I’ll spare you the details, but after two injections in the rear end, he’s on the mend and should be just fine.

It's never fun to see a child of mine be poked and prodded, but he really was a champ through it all and rather entertaining. He immediately began plotting his escape plan upon hearing that he would be receiving shots. The intricate plan even included a disguise and transforming into a statue. Although he sadly uttered a good old fashioned “poor me” after the medicine was administered, the stickers and wheelchair must have trumped the traumatic time because he declared his trip to the hospital as his favorite part of the day.

However, the best question was asked before we even arrived at the clinic: “Are they going to give me Benadryl?”

Only a nurse’s child would ask such a thing.

Miss Manners

After watching E shove an entire handful of cubed watermelon into her mouth tonight, I gently instructed, “E, use your fork for the watermelon. Use your manners please.”

She picked up her fork, looked at it momentarily, and set it back on the table.

She then clearly stated, “No, thank you.”

30 and Counting

I have now lived thirty full years (and nearly 3 days to be exact). We celebrated this milestone with a long and relaxing weekend. The kids had a vacation at Grandma and Grandpa's house while we spent a couple of nights in a nearby city shopping, movie going, walking, and dining out.

With the exception of the unexpected drag queen entertainment at dinner, none of our activities were overly adventurous, but there was something so refreshing about doing ordinary things without the worry of diapers or car seats. We spent the remainder of the holiday weekend playing cards, watching fireworks, eating, and swimming/freezing at the pool with the kids and family.

The best part of all was having my little family sing me "Happy Birthday" tonight over fresh brownies. This simple moment was such an incredible reminder of how great it is to be living each day with them. I could just see the joy and love written all over each of their faces. BEAUTIFUL!!

I've had a few people ask me how I feel about turning the big 3-0. When the optometrist mentioned "birthday related changes" at my last appointment, it took a couple of moments to stagger through the denial before I could fully comprehend what he was implying. And I have to admit that my heart rate momentarily increased when the nurse at my doctor's office started her reply to my concerns with, "Well, when women approach a new decade of life. . ."

To be completely honest though, I'm excited about it. I have all I could possibly ask for in this earthly life and then some. Even though back then I had the endurance to party like a rock star and wake up wanting to do it all again, I have more purpose and direction than I did ten years ago. Thank God for that -- literally! I've found Jesus (that happened about 4 years ago), my family is fantastic, my friends are loyal, and I have more interests and hobbies than I ever have had before.

Bring on the 30s!